I had a call from a guy who didn’t really want to experience a session in the Principal’s office himself. Rather, he wanted to be given the experience of observing a young man being disciplined for typical male behaviors that might surface as “acting out” in school. You know what I mean, the sorts of behaviors that young women don’t seem to do nearly as often as boys, if at all. Most of the time, the guys are distracted by their raging hormones that scream mate! Be they academic issues, behavioral problems, or showing a lack of respect to the dominant females in charge in this school, there’s always plenty to blame on these guys.
I know all these things because I have worked in schools as my other job, so I can give it those little touches that either reflect reality or speak to my own fantasy of how a school might be run by female supremacists intent on breaking and training the males in their charge.
They remind me of the Alice Cooper song Eighteen: “I’ve got a baby’s brain and an old man’s heart”, except that the Principal finds it useful to be significantly less generous to miscreants, putting them a bit lower on the evolutionary scale. (For more on this, see Getting in touch with the inner lizard)
Don’t tell me that I’m stereotyping – of course I am. This is not about reality, it’s an excuse for a little fantasy.
So I recreated the experience for the caller, placing him as voyeur. He observed me forcing the rule-breaker to admit his crimes, giving him a well-deserved spanking, then a session in learning to take orders from a woman while associating learning with pleasure – in other words, teaching him to masturbate according to my exacting specifications, alternately lecturing in female supremacy and male inferiority.
I spoke of what we can learn about male behaviors by observing the gender-linked behaviors of other species, of the superior design of the female body, and of genetic issues involved with being saddled with a y chromosome rather than an extra x chromosome. I reminded him of how goofing-off in class is cutting into his future suitability as a submissive, the highest goal for a male. Finally, I described for him what might happen if he got sent to the nurse’s office for an exam to see if she can figure out what is wrong with him and “fix” it. But it looks like there was a little role reversal going on. My voyeur got sucked up into the experience himself. What happened in the nurse’s office just did him in. I guess she found out what was wrong with him and “fixed” it.
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It turns out a favorite client of mine has been so inspired by his experiences in the Principal’s office of my fantasy high school that he has decided to write a book expanding on that fantasy and adding his own personal touch. I have been receiving chapters as they are ready, and I am indeed impressed. Most of the action in the fantasies I spin takes place in the Principal’s office, where bad boys are sent for firm guidance, lessons in socialization and/or a little training in proper masturbation technique. From what I have seen so far, most of this book takes place in the rest of the school and its environs, and the head of the school plays a smaller role in comparison to a seeming army of deeply committed and sometimes militaristic female supremacists and their well-trained male followers.
The school provides strict guidance of the sort a discreet Principal could only dream of. Indeed, it is the sort of training that perhaps only the most recalcitrant miscreats really need. But since most of the boys have been sent to this school for behavioral and academic difficulties revolving around stereotypical male behavior, a whole lot of strict discipline and training seems to be going on at all times.
The academy is a boarding school intended to teach the girls to dominate men while mastering high level academic subject matter. Unfortunately the boys, having been sent there because of their difficulties in focusing on academics in the first place, uniformly need to be trained using a behaviorist psychology that tends to involve more punishment than reward until they see the light and learn proper behavior.
Got an academic fantasy you’ve been dying to play out, but no Principal to play with? Give me a call so I can give you a personal orientation session today!
I wasn’t planning on doing another entry for a while on the differences between men and women, but an article just popped up on MSNBC, and I couldn’t resist. It just goes to show you how badly men, even the finest specimens of their gender, need a female to help them focus.
[I linked to the article, but it seems to have gone poof. I'll summarize here.
It was the story of three men whose wives go away for the summer, formerly a not uncommon occurrence, but less frequent nowadays, as wives work. The three families profiled in the story had a man who was staying home for the summer while working at his job, while the wife took the children abroad to travel or stay with relatives. The men in the story regressed to remote-clicking beer-swilling card-playing layabouts, but complained to their wives how they felt stressed by the situation. The wives, meanwhile, caring for all the kids alone, were suggesting that the men definitely had the easy end of the deal.]
Regardless of how hard we try to pretend to believe in the egalitarian model – the one where all behavior differences between males and females result from gender-based differences in their upbringing – we are only paying lip service to it.
You see, I have a different definition of “politically correct” than the right wing establishment does. For them it has a variety of meanings. In other words, it means whatever they mean it to mean, always involving apocryphal “liberals” infringing on the “rights” of free-speaking neo-fascists, oops, fine upstanding Republican citizens, to harass people of color or women trying to break out of the mold – unless they are Ann Coulter – and just in general, to stand in opposition for civility, respect, and verifiable facts.
For me it means any opinion at all which brings the criticism, “You shouldn’t have said that because it goes against our dogma.”
I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating, especially since I may not have said it in this blog: I blame the education system for the existence of know-nothing no-fact right wing pundits and running dogs. Heck, I’m willing to blame them for the existence of the majority of magickal thinkers of all other political persuasions, too. Moi? I don’t discriminate.
What they teach in school these days is that facts aren’t important. What’s important is understanding the theory behind the facts. Well, guess what! Any theory is built on facts. Not knowing facts means you don’t understand the theory, plain and simple, and you’re taking it on faith if you say you do. Kids are learning that all ideas are equally valid and deserving of support, whether they are supported by facts or the fabrication of a deranged and addled mind. (Anybody you know?)
But getting back to the subject at hand, it really is the observations that matter. If you observe differences between males and females, and you write about them, but fail to acknowledge you are doing this, then in the very least you are showing your blind spot for all the world to see. They call it “cognitive dysfunction” – believing two things at the same time that are simultaneously impossible – yet failing to recognize that this is the case.
Clearly these males are in need of strict guidance by a female, and are unable to function productively in her absense.
Perhaps the wife should make arrangements for a surrogate to whip them into line on occasion.
I’ve got a fairly new 800 number, and I’ve also got some new phone lines, which means I get a lot of wrong numbers, calls intended for the previous holders of the numbers. No, Brenda isn’t here. I can’t provide you with a new turntable. I have no idea what happened to those people…
Finally I had a really interesting wrong number today. I asked the caller if he wanted to do a call, and he asked for “Skyler”. As far as I know, nobody by that name has ever worked in my group, so I asked him how long it had been since he’d called that number, and he said it had been a while.
I thought that was a little strange. The number would have to have been really old to have been a phone sex service that had the number before the trading company. But don’t worry, it gets stranger.
He was happy to do a call, although a little perplexed by the fact that the phone number he had called went right through to a girl instead of to the dispatcher he expected. He asked for 30 minutes, then told me his fantasy – of being caught by a teacher while doing something naughty and punished. Hmm, his fantasy is my specialty, too…
So after the call we chatted for a few minutes. I wanted to make sure he had the correct number to call me back, and he went to look in his address book. Lo and behold, he had intended to call L Enterprises, but had dialed a number on the line right beneath it, my number that he had no recollection of having written down anytime recently – though it must have been within the past month, or the number would have been for a trading company. He’d forgotten to put any info about that number with it, so it was orphaned there, waiting to be called accidentally.
So I ended up doing a 30 minute call with a wrong number. Works for me.