01.05.07
Weird sex: giant squid do it deeper
Just in case the story goes “poof”, I’ll summarize it here briefly.
During one week in September of 2005, five giant squid washed up on beaches near Vigo, Spain. The largest was more than twelve meters long.
Apparently giant squid strandings are not as unusual in Vigo as they would be on my local beach. Nevertheless, since the creatures are rare and hard to observe when they’re alive, scientists take the opportunity to study those that strand on beaches.
One interesting thing they found, something seen before in other strandings, was a male who had inseminated himself accidentally – or so they surmised. This had been observed previously with other males found washed up on beaches.
What happens is that the normal mating activity involves a male grabbing a female and holding her long enough to inject her with a packet of sperm. Since she probably doesn’t want to be injected, and she’s bigger than he is, the male has developed the longest penis in the world to safely reach her. According to the article,
The male’s sexual organ is actually a bit like a high-pressure fire hose and is normally nearly as long as his body – excluding legs and head.
So it seems that a penis that big is a little hard to aim properly.
Or maybe the problem is that the researchers just don’t think like giant squid. Maybe the pain of being injected with this was less than the pleasure of letting it go. Perhaps, given the fact that he was in the process of stranding on a beach, he decided to do it once more for old time’s sake, and masturbated, injecting himself with the packet, giving new meaning to the phrase, “Go fuck yourself.”
